Taking the Natural Man out of Marriage

What is the natural man? The natural man is an enemy to God. The natural man follows the ideas and guidance of the world instead of God. The natural man is, "a person who chooses to be influenced by the passions, desires, appetites, and senses of the flesh rather than by the promptings of the Holy Spirit. Such a person can comprehend physical things but not spiritual things. All people are carnal, or mortal, because of the fall of Adam and Eve. Each person must be born again through the atonement of Jesus Christ to cease being a natural man" (The Guide to the Scriptures). If all men became natural through the fall of Adam, how can we make sure to avoid it, especially in our marriages?

           Like stated above, the natural man gets wrapped up in worldly things that don't matter. We can often see examples of this through observation of couples that we know, couples in movies, or even in our own marriages. From the book, The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John M. Gottman we can learn so many instances where individuals get caught battling with the natural man in their marriage. The natural man in a marriage creates stone walls, forgets to offer compassion, create wedges between spouses, and eventually disintegrates the family. In The Family: A Proclamation to the World, we learn that every family must be centered on the principles of Christ and if one partner acts more as a natural man, than a child of God these principles will not be taught or practiced.

             There are many things that help allow the natural man to be cast out of marriages and a good foundation or starting point is friendship as we learn from Gottman. As friendship becomes a building block in marriage couples can use one another to push away from the natural man and become more loving just as Christ would do. God designed marriage for many reasons and a big aspect is the sense of unity that it brings to two individuals. The natural man does not create unity, but instead does the exact opposite, tear marriages apart. In my own marriage I am able to understand that I need to turn to our Savior when I feel the natural man creeping into my heart. It is impossible to be perfect in our marriages, but as we become better at recognizing when the natural man in present, we can then shift gears and have Christ be present instead.